Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Evening Bookgroup

It was a bittersweet time at Evening Bookgroup tonight. As you may remember, we meet once a month, and we never know how many of our 17 or so members will actually show up to discuss the book we've read for the month.

Bookgroups are fabulous because they give you a chance to really get to know women from all different perspectives. Not just from the polite, socially correct perspective, but in ways that may surprise, shock and maybe even confuse you.

Tonight we met to discuss "The Memorykeeper's Daughter." Which, I'm sure our Bookgroup would highly recommend to you, and we discovered so many things we weren't expecting...at least I did. Some are secret things only for us....but..

First of all, we discovered that one of our friends was just diagnosed with cancer. And, she still insisted on hostessing our Group, told us about her situation, enjoyed wine with us, discussed the book and shared how she intends to be the fighter her parents guided her to be in life. It was inspiring and silenced me in my spirit in a way that I can hardly express.

The book discussion led us to learn how each of us felt about choices made in life, and how quickly they can form or deform a relationship. How in a fraction of a moment a word can be left unspoken and that moment can change the course of a person's life forever. How fragile relationships and people really are, and how we can't possibly hope to understand how another will cope or feel or live with a circumstance or choice they are confronted with in life.

We learned that each of us expresses the artist in us in different ways. Just as one likes to paint, another loves to interior design or work with fabrics, or mixed media or stitch or dance or just draw. That one may be visual in their reading, while another is spacial; and one is "seeing" a scene vividly, and another had no impression of the same scene at all!

Bookgroups are learning experiences in many ways for women who may have stopped growing intellectually. There's something to be said about stretching one's mind and touching upon things that are difficult to look at in the "nice talk" living rooms that we visit to have coffee and stitch in. Sometimes it's good to look at hard things and talk them out!

Every bookgroup I've ever been in...my Wellesley Group of 10 years, especially, was a very extraordinary experience of personal growth for me, and I think for all involved. Something about the venue opens not just our mouths, but our souls, our hearts, our guts and our minds.

In order to face life we have to face the realities of life, and we can't always sugar-coat it. Thank God for women who can get together, form real, intellectual and meaningful relationships, and true support groups.

I'm so happy to be a part of such a women's group. I hope you have or will start one of your own. They are priceless.
I also cherish the stitching friends and relationships I have with each of you who visit me here,
BTW: You're probably wondering what on earth these fairies have to do with the price of beans!! :)) We also talked about my HAED RR tonight, as well!! They all think I'm a very "feyish" personality and were not at all surprised that I liked stitching fairies and such!! Go figure!


Barbara said...

I tried to join a bookgroup here, but it just didn't work for me in another language. I'd love to join an English-language one. Maybe I should hang some posters up at the library.

Those fairies are interesting. Who's the designer?

Itching To Stitch said...

Your book group sounds like it's very friendly and encouraging. So nice to have a group like that. I love those fairies too ;)

Erica said...

I feel much the same way about my book club which just met last night as well.

The ladies in my group (we're quite small, there's only 7 of us)mean so much to me and we've discovered many great books together and cemented out friendships in many ways.

Bev said...

love the fairys ( and your blog will add you when my pc stops playing up- hope this posts as as i have tried 3 times now ARGHH!! lol)
where are the fairys from?

Michelle said...

I love my book group as well, I find that even though I have impressions about the book from reading it, discussing it opens up a whole new insight into the book. I am glad that you've found the joys of your book group as well and stretching yourself with going beyond "polite" conversation. That's what I love about it too!

Margaret said...

Like you, I find that the relationships which a book club forms are very special and rewarding. Is it something about people with very different interests in life finding a platform to discuss their differences & similarities?

When we were living in California I was a member of one of these wonderful groups and I still miss it when the third Friday of the month rolls around. One book which brought our group into a very heated discussion was Joan Anderson's "A Year By The Sea". Yet no matter how intense the discussion or the differences of opinion we came and left as friends.

I will keep your friend in my thoughts and prayers. It sounds like her attitude is good and that will be a large part of the battle.(I speak from experience)

Katrina said...

It's nice you have a good group of ladies! Lots of good thoughts and prayers for your friend. My DH's step-mom was just diagnosed with ovarian cancer. She's very young, only 49 so it's all a bit of a shock.

Kajsa said...

Your book group sounds wonderful! I want to do something like that when the kids are a bit older.

Cute fairies!

Wendy said...

Very interesting to read about your book group, Deb. I never thought such a group would be of interest to me, but after reading about yours....I may have to give it some thought now. Thanks!

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